Our Family Tree

David and I are Pet Parents. We are two humans in our early 50s who are raising and directing the lives of 6 four legged kids who are not human. I call myself a hu-mom, not their bio-mom, but still I love them just the same. I hold them when they are scared. I kiss their heads and the top of their heads in affection. They know my Mom voice when I am telling them to stop an action that is not going in with the rules of the house or maybe stepping on another’s boundaries.

I do let them work it out most of the time, but when you have a cat named Oski, who doesn’t seem to know when to honor another’s boundary I will step in and use my loud, deep almost growl like voice to warn them. They do listen. As long as I have been with all my 4-legged kids, as I call them, I realize they understand the steady stream of our family energy. It doesn’t matter what species our bodies are in, we just know we are connected. I understand their moods and feelings just by becoming quiet and observing them, and their body movements.

Sometimes I will get communication by the response to my words. Whether they are reading my energy or remember the sounds of the consonants or vowels. For example, when Reggie is out and I ask him if he is a happy bunny, he will look at me then in a split second, he is jumping in air with an ethusiam that says “Yes mommy, I’m happy”. Then I will start doing my own strange form of a bunny dance and he seems pleased-that is the feeling I get from him.

With Oski, the Bart Simpson of the family, he is very head strong. When he wants something, such as a snack, if I am not facing him, he will knock something off the counter- then look at me as if to say “do I have your attention now?” If I say out loud “yes I hear you, what do you want?” He will stop for a brief moment to see if I come into the kitchen.

When I follow him to the kitchen. I will ask him if he wants food. I wait. Then I wait some more. He has a challenge with focus so I have to quiet my energy to help ground him. Eventually he will get off the counter (sometimes I have to give a gentle nudge to remind him) then he jumps off the counter and starts pacing. I will say, “you know what I want you to do, right”? He may pace a little longer, then I will see him sit down quietly and look at me. When he wants to get extra points, he will raise his paw to give a “hi-five” that we taught him.

I will praise him for being such a polite cat and give him a snack. We only feed them a little bit at a time, so the food doesn’t go to waste, so they eat throughout the day. Oski, who seems to have a high metabolism, seems to eat more than the other cats in the house. I am glad to give him a snack. He has come a long way. We taught him to get quiet and polite by using the clicker method. It really helped him to get his focus. Now I can give him a look across the room and he will come to me if I use my fingers. I use my concentration and focus and imagine I have a stream of energy coming from my Solar plexus. If I am totally present with my message, he will come prancing up to me.

The girls in the family-Moon, Fiona and Emma seem to read us pretty well, and they will stop what they are doing right away if they are forgetting the rules of the house. We don’t have to raise our voices. All the cats have their own personalities. Moon is regal, quiet and poised. She has a grace when she moves and I have always thought of her as a ballerina. I am convinced that Moon sees David as her mate and I am her friendly rival. She doesn’t mind my sharing him. And she loves to get on my lap to take a rest. But she does love to talk when she is hungry. She is very verbal. So it isn’t necessary to try to communicate energetically.

Fiona-Her full name is Fiona the Fearless, is a little spitfire and moves very quickly. If she had to go outdoors and hunt for her food, she would be the top mouser in the neighborhood. She has very quick reflexes and when we dole out the treats we have to throw her the treat first because she will move anyone out of the way to make sure she gets her prize. In fact she prefers when I throw out the treat so she can hunt it and pounce on it. There are times when I throw the treat in the air and she will leap into the air and twirl her body to catch it. She also likes to use the slick surface of the linoleum to slide across the floor. If she had the body mechanics and awareness, she would probably love to ice skate or roller blade. I never have the camera close by to catch her graceful athletic moves but it is incredible.

Emma, who I call our wild child, has lived at our home since before we moved in 9 years ago. But this black and white cat caught our attention when we saw her one Saturday morning moving her last litter of kittens to a safe place when someone doing yard work was invading their home. I loved her courage and diligence to her babies getting them to safety. Of course I realize now that she could read us well enough to know we were not going to harm her or her brood. Two ladies in the neighborhood got all the kittens and found them homes. Emma, who we called “black and white kitty” in the beginning, could not be caught to get spayed. Since she was a feral cat, she learned not to trust humans. I can’t say I blamed her. We humans have not had a good track record when being responsible pet owners (but it is changing-the consciousness is growing).

We knew we had to give her time. So we did. I would talk to her and tell her that if she went to the vet and got the operation, she wouldn’t have to have more kittens and she would feel better and calmer. It took us a few months of talking and feeding her, but one morning, she allowed David to pick her up and we got her to the vet. I intuitively knew that if Emma didn’t want to be caught, she wouldn’t. She convalesced then decided to go back to her outdoor home. I couldn’t blame her. This was she home, she knew the best places to hide and stay safe. When it was clement outside and rainy, she seemed to know how to stay dry. David and I knew we had to meet her on her terms.

But that didn’t stop me from talking to her and telling her how much we would like her to come into the house when it was cold and wet outside. I told her it would be her safe place away from the elements. We knew she loved to be outdoors and we would respect that, but when she wanted a warm dry place, she was welcome to come inside. The cats in the home would look out through the door and sometimes I could see them communicating silently. I could feel that she was thinking more and more about our offer. She would come closer to us. With me she would sort of sniff to see what my character was-was I an ok human or not? She seemed more comfortable with David. He was her rescuer after all. He got her to the vet and now she was feeling better because of it.

I think it took two years before she finally said, “ok, I will give it a try. My last pitch I said “You know you can still stay outdoors, we know It is your home, but if you do want to come indoors, I need to give you a name. That is what humans do as a form of affection. I want to call you Emma because I think this name is a combination of femininity and strength. If you like the name, then come into the house to let me know. Two weeks later she did.

She still stays outdoors primarily, but as she has gotten older, she will curl up on the sofa or one of the dining room chairs and take a nap. It still makes me feel warmth that we were able to come to an understanding. She trusts us to the best of the ability being that we are still humans. But I know she likes the food and the different places she can find to take a nap and the other cats respect her-except Oski-our little boundary taker. But Emma can put Oski in his place if he forgets and it is done with firmness, a deep fierce growl and he retreats.

Then we have our two mini-lops, Buster and Reggie. They were both adopted from the humane society, both house broken and we have things to bunny proof the house to save it from their very sharp claws and teeth. They do have similar markings, but their personalities are unique. Reggie is a rabbit with a lot of warrior energy. He doesn’t have time for humans that don’t understand him or get in the way when he has a mission to accomplish. But he also has a sense of fun, like all rabbits and lagomorphs before him. We share a dance of two together when I get home in the evening, but mostly loves to lay and meditate. And when I need him to go back to his cage. I have to ask politely and let him go in at his own place or he will growl at me to show his displeasure. When he knows I have surrendered then he will calm down and within a few minutes he is back in his cage. He understands me somehow. It is still amazing that he is listening. And yes, we speak two different languages and we are two different species.

We move on to the baby of the family-Buster our 1 ½ year old. He is lively, curious and if he was in a rabbit warren, he would be the strategist that would find all the safe places in their territory. He loves me. He will come when I call him and if I kneel down he will come up and sniff me. One time when I was trying to take his photo, he ran up to me and laid down next to me. He was too close for me to take his picture, but this was a much better experience. Bonding with the baby bunny. He isn’t as warrior-energy driven as Reggie. I think that is why they get along so well. Buster is an easygoing little boy. So Reggie doesn’t feel threatened and Buster will always oblige Reggie when he lays down his head for a grooming session. I have read that two boys don’t get along well because of territory instincts, but they seem to do ok. I believe it is their personalities. There is no rivalry.

Yes, I feel proud of the job David and I have done in raising happy, healthy 4-legged kids. Both David and I Feed them, give them shelter, take them to the vet when they get sick and we both give them lots of love. They are inquisitive, independent and a constant source of trust and unconditional acceptance. We are very blessed. We have the opportunity to see their view of the world and as our vision and understanding of who they are grows, this knowledge goes out to the universe and more people and animals get the benefit of our experiences. It may go out as a whisper or a feeling, but as the whisper gets louder and more people answer the call, the world gets healed. Ghandi and St. Francis would be proud.